bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
