This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I think I won the penis lottery.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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