Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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