It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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