Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
