Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
