I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
