I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
