I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
