so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
