If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
