Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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