i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
No I am not eating basil off your cock
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
