sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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