I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Farmville is her only friend.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
