Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Randomize
