The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
