Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
