she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Found the puke drawer
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize