Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
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