Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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