your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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