Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
