I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
