Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
