plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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