Whod you bang
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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