I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
