you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
