I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
