I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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