White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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