Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
