We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Randomize
