some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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