Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
