The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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