i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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