Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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