I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
