If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
