I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I will be naked everywhere
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
