YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
