Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I don't deserve a penis
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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