Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
