you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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