no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
