i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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