I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
