he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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